Fabio Capello versus the English Press: Round One

The new England manager locked horns with his mortal enemies this afternoon, and lived to tell the tale.. Signor Capello (or Mr. Hair to give his translated English title) looked calm and confident as he faced the men and women who will be tearing him apart at the first hint of England not definitely winning World Cup 2010. They asked him several awkward questions, which Capello took in through his translator then filtered back through the same man and out to the press again as if it were the most natural process in the world. He also promised to take on an English coach (that’s a football coach of English nationality, not someone to coach him in speaking English) and to be fluent in time for the February 2008 friendly against Switzerland. But mostly he batted away questions as if the legends of the demonic English journos were just silly exaggerations. If only Steve McClaren had pretended not to speak English, maybe he would have lasted longer. Video of Fabio Capello’s first meeting with the press after the jump.

It’s a bit lengthly, what with all the translating back and forth, so here’s a quick summary that captures Capello’s genius for not giving too much away…

PRESS: Why are England so rubbish?
FC: I don’t know, but I’ve got until September to figure it out.

PRESS: Will you pick England players who act like lazy drunken prima donas?
FC: Probably not.

PRESS: (to Brian Barwick) Why are you paying Fabio Capello so much money?
BB: Because we can.

PRESS: (to Capello again) Why do you have such a big backroom staff?
FC: They go everywhere with me. Haven’t you seen “Entourage?”

PRESS: If you had to choose between the England job and th Italy job, which would you rather do?
FC: [chuckle] England.

PRESS: Is it true you punched Paolo Di Canio and will you please punch Frank Lampard?
FC: No and no.

PRESS: Grazi Grazie*
FC: Thank you.

Complete press conference video available via the BBC.

*thanks to alex for correcting my woeful Italian spelling