World Cup Moments: The Graham Poll, Mwepu Ilunga & Diana Ross Trio of High Comedy

April 7th, 2010 | by: chris | View Comments

Most of the World Cup’s greatest moments involve tears from someone – either good or bad. These also involved tears, but more the “bellowing into laughter” kind – the light side of football.

The wrong way – Zaire, 1974

Zaire had a rough go of World Cup 1974. While Holland were enthralling with Total Football, they were being totally blown out. A 3-0 with Brazil gets the most pub, but that was a close game compared to the 9-0 they suffered against Yugoslavia the game previous. As one would expect, 9-0 losses typically represent the low mark of a World Cup experience. (If it doesn’t, support groups should be formed.)

If anything could represent the high mark of a 0, 14, -14 World Cup record, it was Mwepu Ilunga’s confusion before a Brazilian free kick. With Brazil setting up for a free kick 20m from Zaire’s goal, Ilunga had a sudden bout of amnesia and forgot that it was not, in fact, their free kick.

(Ahem. I much prefer this post about Ilunga Mwepu. Much better. – Daryl)

Ilunga, like any good footballer, disagrees with the notion he did anything wrong and stands his ground.

***

The third yellow – Josip Simunic v Australia, 2006

There are many times when football fans think a referee should retire based on a colossal faux pas. Most don’t comply; Graham Poll, however, did.

In the final group match between Australia & Croatia, the Aussies needed only a draw to advance through to the knockout. Between the 85th & 87th minutes and the score an even 202, both team had a player sent off, making it 10 v 10. In the 90th, Croatia were handicapped further after Josip Simunic – that’s Australian-born Josip Simunic – received his second yellow. Only Poll hadn’t noticed two yellows equal a red, and allowed Simunic to continue on…until the 93rd, when he received his third yellow and a long (well, three minute) overdue shower.

Australia still went through and Poll retired from international refereeing on the back of his little oopsie.

***

The Diana Ross penalty, 1994

If there was ever proof the only diva who should be taking penalties is Cristiano Ronaldo, this is it.

Ridiculous things happen when non-footballers, particularly non-footballers wearing non-footballing shoes, are asked to perform the simplest of footballing tasks. This was to be the case when FIFA asked Diana Ross to “kick off” the 1994 World Cup with the simplest of tasks: put the ball into an exploding goal frame.

Diana tried the Paradinha-with-backslide, which even the greatest of footballers would find difficult. She failed miserably.

- For more World Cup Moments, go here.