Why You Should Go to the World Cup Host Country

Ten things about Germany that I will never forget.

10. Making friends at an event monikered “A Time to Make Friends.” Because make friends I did. Almost every day. I think my favorite single serving friend was Malik, a German whom who I met on my first day at the Fan Mile who taught himself English watching the Simpsons and translating the subtitles. While walking back, he went into a long explanation of how we were in the most dangerous part of Berlin and how people drive around that area all night just looking for people walking by themselves to beat up. He then quickly explained that he had to get on the train and that I would have to walk the rest of the way home by myself.

9. “Sprecken ze Englisch?” It’s a comically effective pick-up line and a useful phrase whether you’re in a bar, club or lost in a train station. Pretty girls always want to practice their English and if you ask any American you’ve got an instant friend.

8. Sitting in the shade outside of the stadium in Frankfurt waiting for the England vs. Paraguay game and being approached by two extremely pretty journalists writing a story about the fan culture and experience of the World Cup and explaining that I was doing the exact same thing. We took each other’s picture.

7. Finding a guy selling tickets to a quarterfinal game for 30 Euros. That’s about an 80% discount off face value and a kid on Christmas feeling for someone that didn’t even think he was going to get to see a game because of a tight budget. Italy vs. Ukraine wasn’t exactly a marquee match-up but watching Luca Toni score two goals and seeing just exactly how skilled and how fast these players are in person made me think that I might have paid twice what I did to get in.

6. Being interviewed three times, for three different Spanish television shows after picking a Spain Jersey at random out of a pile at World Cup Blog HQ. I knew nothing about the team and the experience cured me of the universal need to be on television. I wish never to be on TV again.

5. German beer. OK, I don’t actually drink, but running into they guys you’re working for in the local bar after they have had four or five too many and spent the day in the sun leads to some pretty priceless conversation and a lot of undeserved accolades. Amazingly, because of the natural ingredients and lack of preservatives, German beer produces only the slightest of hangovers.

4. Embracing the idea that nothing else matters. America might invade Iran? North Korea’s testing mid-range missiles and developing their nuclear program? Forest fires? Google added to the English lexicon? If it didn’t happen on the field I didn’t hear about it, so in a kind of Aristotle vs. Philip K Dick existential impossibility sort of way it didn’t happen. And that can be comforting.

3. Touring Berlin on a bike. Writing for a website doesn’t exactly provide the thrill seeker in me with much of an outlet, but the rush of entering German traffic on a fat tire cruiser having no idea what the rules of the road are was roughly equivalent to last summer’s cliff jumping expedition on a river in Oregon. Unlike last summer’s trip, I didn’t end up hitch hiking home after losing my car keys in the water, so Berlin rates slightly higher.

2. Weaving in and out of soft-core English Hooligans as they ransack a street that is contained by police officers at one and a steady stream of traffic at the other.

1. Being present at the most-watched event in the history of the world at the time. An event with close to 1.5 billion viewers scattered throughout Europe, Asia, North and South America, Africa and Australia, and, with cameras rolling and focused on me, probably streaming my actions live and tape delayed to the curious eyes of those who would probably choose to be there if they could and are relying on me to convey the experience in some way whether it be through this website or through my actions on camera, walking over to a chain link fence and taking a whiz.

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