The World Cup Final of Culture

July 9th, 2006 | by: Peter |

The odds makers like Italy, the Germans like beer and everyone likes Zidane, but today class, we’re looking at how these teams compare on the canvas instead of the field. Who will emerge victorious in the World Cup of Culture?

We start off with music, where both countries have long and established traditions in opera and classical music that I know nothing about so it’s difficult to determine an advantage. Let’s move on to the current top 40. Topping the Italian list, according to mp3charts.com, is Vittorio Merlo’s latin single “Rassa Rassa Rassa Baila.” Bruno Fergani’s “Trancelation” beats out a whole lot of other techno music in France, but isn’t quite doing so well in total downloads.

Advantage: That’s one too many Rassa’s for me to dance to in Italy and I like the foreigner friendly vibe of “Trancelation.” France 1 Italy 0.

Now to the movies of the World Cup finalists. I don’t want to cater to the Netflix crowd, so I’m not looking at movies actually made by the French or Italians. Instead I’m looking at a real measure of the countries, the quality of the American movies set in France and Italy.

France has seen many a film crew, but they don’t seem to stick with their strengths. “Interview with the Vampire” is the exact inverse of “Chocolat,” so those two cancel each other out. Luckily “Ronin” was set in the south of France as was “The Transporter” so France comes away looking strong with good chase scenes.

Italy’s resume includes “The Italian Job,” which has about as much to do with Italy as “The French Connection,” but they come back with “Roman Holiday,” “The Talented Mr. Ripley” and “The English Patient.”

Advantage: An Academy Award winning snorer, I had to give up most of a day to sit through “The English Patient” and I’m still bitter. France 2 Italy 0.

When comparing great works of Literature (literally: Books) Italy looks like the early leader. Italy produced Petrarch, famous for the Petrarchan sonnet which Shakespeare really cashed in on when he began comparing thy temperate and lovely subject to summers days. Italy also spawned Dante Alighieri, whose damn Divine Comedy scared us half to death but kept us out of trouble during high school. Giovanni Boccaccio, who wins the award for the most Italian sounding name in history, wrote the Decameron, and I’m trying to plow through that now, but with all the games it hasn’t gotten much face time.

France has more well known contemporary (readable) writers like Jules Verne and Marcel Proust and I know Stendhal urged clarity above all, but I’m not sure that it puts them above the classics in Italy.

Advantage: It’s basically a draw with France coming on strong in the second half, but since Italy’s down 2-0 I’ll give it to them. France 2 Italy 1.

Italy has the lead in painters and ninja turtles, but unfortunately that’s not a category in today’s competition. Instead, we turn to food. Italy does have some tasty spaghetti, but France gets points for difficulty as they try to do things like make snails tasty. It might be a draw if Catherine de Medici’s marriage to King Henri II hadn’t imported the entire Italian cooking system of bringing out natural flavors instead of masking them to France.

Advantage: The French owe it all to the old school Italians. France 2 Italy 2.

The World Cup of Culture goes to a shoot-out after an electric game. France doesn’t generally do to well with anything involving shooting, but Italy hasn’t won a World Cup match that has gone to penalty kicks…ever.

It’s a good thing a country’s culture has little to do with their achievements on the field.

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unseenop

Your literature analysis forgot one important work that would put Italy over the top without a doubt. Niccolo Machiavelli’s (sp?) political classic The Prince
diego

So the Mona Lisa, painted by an Italian, rests at a museum in France, but I guess that doesn’t help break the tie…
How about architecture???
I mean, I love Notre Damme but I bet the crowds at the Colisseum where the closest thing to football fans before there ever was football… :)
Laurent

Peter Spaghetti was brought to Italy by marco polo…..
by the way the best chinese restaurant are in Paris
marie

The French certainly have some great writers that weren’t mentioned. How about Voltaire, Moliere, Montesquieu, Dumas, Baudelaire, Camus, Anatole France, Hugo, La Fontaine, George Sand, Flaubert… the list goes on and on.

How about great moments in history as a category? Because nothing beats the French Revolution.
nicko

France has the worst chinese food I’ve tasted anywhere – yes even compared with the US!
leaving out Victor Hugo in the writing stakes is a bit rough …

In film stakes, french films are several grades above hollywood – except when they try to mimick hollywood like les rivieres pourpres, on the other hand spaghetti westerns were awesome … but then the french had ‘taxi’ … man this is hard!
Le Boxerase

You all have to be kidding a Jeb. France can’t compare in culture, food or folks. F’em! FORZA ITALIA!
Steve D

How about number of Scientific ,artistic or Historical figures contributed by each?Lets just say that Da Vinci, Michelangelo,Galileo,Galvani,Volta,Bernini,Giotto di bondone,Verdi, Puccini,Fillipo Mazzei(Thomas Jefferson`s mentor)Garibaldi,Marconi, Enrico Fermi,Antonio Meucci( invented Telephone before Bell),Bocaccio,Dante,Pirandello,Paganini,and Cellini make a pretty good player squad.Add to this group, three Goal tenders,(Dino Zoff,Luigi Buffon and Walter Zenga, and we`ll have our World cup team!~!
red

I think it is really hard to compare the cultuure of two nations. I am half french, half german, so i know quite some stuff about food culture.
I think reducing Italy to its pasta & pizza stuff is not fair. Especially northern Italy (due to its variated agriculture) has a lot of really sophisticated products, which are really great.
On the other hand, I think all large countries in Europe contributed to the European cultural inheritage on a qualitative comparable way. I’d say it’s a draw… There was a lot of inner European exchange throughout the history.
Claude

Don’t forget who sacked the Roman Empire. It was the Germanic tribes of which the Francs were one. Go France.
Alessandro

definitely a draw… These two countries are just so rich culturaly wise, on top of that France and Italy have a lot in common since there were many back and forth cultural exchanges and influences. Two great countries which appreciate and respect each other… As for tonight may the best win…
http://blog.livedoor.jp/diet22jap/ Jap

Hi!and Good-bye!

Sorry.Its my test.
Arthur

arts, science and music: italy

literature and philosophy: france

cooking, architecture: draw
mara1ona

Who cares!

Women??

Now we are talking,

The Italians win hands down.
squiggle

Two thirds of the Holy Trinity (the other third being Greece).

No way of seperating them. One says Dante, the other says Victor Hugo; one says Verdi, the other says Debussy; one says the Pantheon, the other says Notre-Dame; one says Paris, the other says Rome; one says Matisse, the other says Raphael; one says Machiavelli, the other says Descartes.

Renaissance Italy and Modernist France are two of those rare periods in history when everything quickened.

Modern European literature began in France with the troubadours and trouveres and French literature dominated the vernacular literatures of the Middle Ages. On the other hand, it was Latin which it succeeded.

Love them.
Rina

i go with mara1ona.but with the italian men!

nothing beats a walk in milan (or anywhere else in italy, even the smallest villages!!) in summer to watch all the tanned and hot italian men on their vespas!!! and the ducatis!! mamma mia!!!

there italy is 6-0. the french men r too effeminate !! u can be guessing for hours ..gay /straight/gay/straight..hmm..tough, he’s french!!!
Jonny Iselin

In terms of film, the French would have to win for their contributions to cinema. In fact, “cinema” is a French word, because the French revolutionized film study and filmmaking in the 1960s and most of the great American directors (George Lucas, Stephen Spielberg, Stanley Kubrick, Martin Scorsesee, Brian de Palma, Francis Ford Coppolla, Rob Altman) are influenced by the french “new wave”
santana

women Italy win by far, food France by far. Literature and philosophy france, food I say france but when it come to disign and architecture Italy. Now down to the game today it is a tough call.