The Best and Worst Dressed

June 18th, 2006 | by: Tom Barry | View Comments

The time has come. It’s a moment about which few have been concerned, but which those who care have been waiting for anxiously enough to wet their girl-sized, low-rise pleather pants. With every team now having had the opportunity to show its colors, it’s time for those colors to be judged. It’s time for the best and worst dressed awards for the 2006 World Cup.

The first fashion faux-pas of this year’s tournament was the placement of two orange-clad teams, Ivory Coast and the Netherlands, in the same group. Aesthetically speaking, this was simply a poor decision, the culmination of which was visible in Friday’s match where Ivory Coast was forced to don their significantly less vibrant, though nominally more appropriate, white jerseys, possibly costing them the match.

Secondly, no fewer than six teams thus far have opted to sport yellow apparel. How embarrassing! Two of the teams, Australia and Togo, have paired their brightly colored jerseys with green, while three others, Sweden, Ukraine, and Ecuador, have opted with the more complimentary blue contrast. But the Brazilian squad has once again outdone its opponents, choosing a uniform which features all three colors for a display which is truly dazzling.

But at least the various yellow-clad teams of this year’s tournament weren’t afraid to use a little bit of color, a lesson that the host Germans and a few of their old-school European brethren would do well to learn. The simple black-and-white motif which has become the nation’s trademark is certainly a one-way ticket to dullsville. And while we’re at it, how long do the Italians honestly expect to command respect on the international stage when they insist on sporting a solid blue one-piece?

The 2006 World Cup is not about carrot-colored uniforms or answering the question of ‘what do we do with an extra three million acres of yellow fabric?’ This year’s style is one which is embodied by two teams which had the courage to be different. Two teams whose sense of style is very much representative of a tablecloth one might use on a weekend picnic.

I’m speaking, of course, about Croatia and Paraguay. Their daring, yet imaginative display should be commended, even if their respective performances were not up to par. Simply imagine if the two teams would have had the opportunity to play head-to-head? The combination of color and patterns would no doubt induce seizures in the stands. But it would be well worth it.

In our next installment, we will examine the style of each nation’s fans. But given the pictures thus far of the Brazilian ladies, I doubt it will be much of a contest.