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The Best and Worst Dressed

   

The time has come. It’s a moment about which few have been concerned, but which those who care have been waiting for anxiously enough to wet their girl-sized, low-rise pleather pants. With every team now having had the opportunity to show its colors, it’s time for those colors to be judged. It’s time for the best and worst dressed awards for the 2006 World Cup.

The first fashion faux-pas of this year’s tournament was the placement of two orange-clad teams, Ivory Coast and the Netherlands, in the same group. Aesthetically speaking, this was simply a poor decision, the culmination of which was visible in Friday’s match where Ivory Coast was forced to don their significantly less vibrant, though nominally more appropriate, white jerseys, possibly costing them the match.

Secondly, no fewer than six teams thus far have opted to sport yellow apparel. How embarrassing! Two of the teams, Australia and Togo, have paired their brightly colored jerseys with green, while three others, Sweden, Ukraine, and Ecuador, have opted with the more complimentary blue contrast. But the Brazilian squad has once again outdone its opponents, choosing a uniform which features all three colors for a display which is truly dazzling.

But at least the various yellow-clad teams of this year’s tournament weren’t afraid to use a little bit of color, a lesson that the host Germans and a few of their old-school European brethren would do well to learn. The simple black-and-white motif which has become the nation’s trademark is certainly a one-way ticket to dullsville. And while we’re at it, how long do the Italians honestly expect to command respect on the international stage when they insist on sporting a solid blue one-piece?

The 2006 World Cup is not about carrot-colored uniforms or answering the question of ‘what do we do with an extra three million acres of yellow fabric?’ This year’s style is one which is embodied by two teams which had the courage to be different. Two teams whose sense of style is very much representative of a tablecloth one might use on a weekend picnic.

I’m speaking, of course, about Croatia and Paraguay. Their daring, yet imaginative display should be commended, even if their respective performances were not up to par. Simply imagine if the two teams would have had the opportunity to play head-to-head? The combination of color and patterns would no doubt induce seizures in the stands. But it would be well worth it.

In our next installment, we will examine the style of each nation’s fans. But given the pictures thus far of the Brazilian ladies, I doubt it will be much of a contest.


  • Ali Siddiqui

    Tom, don’t forget the kit that Ecuador has been wearing! What an eyesore but it certainly is eye catching! Love those Yellow shoes. :D

  • diego

    How do they decide who gets to wear their traditional uniforms and who gets to wear the “away” kits?
    Is it based on the FIFA rankings??? The geographical distance from Germany???

  • diego

    BTW, Paraguayan shirts always looked like pajamas to me, plus i think they look terrible with that big square on the back.
    Also, what is up with the font for the names and numbers in some of those kits??? Doesn’t anybody like Helvetica anymore???

  • Roland

    I love those wacky striped and checkered shirts. To me they scream – futbol. As for italy or Garmany tinkering with a classic look, I agree; but not too much.

    My favorite kits are Spain and England.

  • Laura

    Diego, you’re so right! Some of the numbers look like someone made them with bits of duct tape!
    Me, I appreciate the classy simplicuty of the Italian blue, only topped by the sober, yet elegant dark-dark blue of the Argentinean alternative gear.

  • Zyb

    The Italian trikots have black stuff on it that looks pathetically like sweat stains round their arm pits. The dark Argentinean outfit looks totally cool, agreed!

    I heard that Germany will play in dark red isntead oft white/black from the next round on – like that!

    @ diego: Apparently FIFA chooses a “home” team and a “guest” team for each game (don’t know the criteria for that, though). The guests of course play in their ‘alternative’ colours.

  • jegen

    the colors are decided by pure luck… whoever wins a draw on the eve of the match gets to keep their official colors. so bad australia lost… their match against brazil means a clash, and they will have to play in blue after losing the draw. on second thoughts, so what, we will go ahead and…. yes you heard me right…. win the game…!!!

  • sqiggle

    The clean blue of France and the deep, rich port of Portugal are my favourites. :)

  • squiggle

    I usually like the Italians but those dark stripes aren’t a great idea.

  • Dave Hamilton

    I really haven’t noticed, perhaps because my Dominican girlfriend always is “best-dressed” at every match she attends. But, okay, I always get excited seeing the Brasilian yellow kit. It is non pareil.

    Dave hamildav@yahoo.com

  • Dave Hamilton

    I really haven’t noticed, perhaps because my Dominican girlfriend always is “best-dressed” at every match she attends. But, okay, I always get excited seeing the Brasilian yellow kit.

    Dave hamildav@yahoo.com

  • http://sbcyahoo VJ

    Talk about some nasty uniforms…Look at Croatia! man do they need to find something better than a picnic table cloth! Everytime I see them play I want to either make myself a sandwich or play checkers!

  • http://strategy-soccer.blogspot.com Y

    I believe that the Euro teams are going for the retro look. Just look at the Dutch – they look very 70s. So does England and Germany.

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