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Say it ain’t so. Not all World Cup injuries are real!

By: WC Bob | July 9th, 2006 | 8 Comments »

In what can only be described as a shocking, earth shattering new study, it has been revealed that not all those players you see writhing on the ground in pain during the World Cup are, in fact, in pain. According to Dr. Jiri Dvorak, the head of FIFA’s medical committee, of the 156 on-pitch treatments in the first 62 matches, 88 were not noted in postgame reports submitted by the team medical staffs.

“We have too much of this,” Dvorak said. “It’s something we need to look into.”

One theory that Dr. Dvorak should look into is that the players and medical staffs are in cahoots with the makers of magic spray. The ozone-depleting stuff has been abused more at this World Cup than the Serbia and Montenegro goalkeeper.

For those scoring at home, and if you are you should consider getting a life, on average medics have tended to 2.2 players per match this World Cup, compared to 2.7 in 2002 and 2.4 in 1998.


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Comments
Username By Christopher Johnson | July 9th, 2006 at 6:16 am
top comment
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Petition

I have just read and signed the online petition: “FIFA World Cup: Flopping Penalty and Concurrent Replay” hosted on the web by PetitionOnline.com at:

http://www.PetitionOnline.com/fifaexec/

I personally agree with what this petition says, and I think you might agree, too. If you can spare a moment, please take a look, and consider signing yourself.

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Steven | July 9th, 2006 at 8:34 am
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What do they mean when they say that the injuries were not noted in post-game reports? Is it a requirement that all injuries have to be reported? What if, for example, a player is kicked in the thigh and it hurts at the time (and they bust out the magic spray or whatever), but there is no real injury, it’s just a pain that subsides…is that supposed to be reported too? If so, that means over half the injuries are faked!

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Bruce Buck | July 9th, 2006 at 9:08 am
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If you watch North American sports, you’ll notice the unwritten rule that it’s unacceptable for a professional athlete to writhe around like a two year old in response to a minor injury. It’s even worse if the unmanly overacting is entirely fictional. The dramatics are perhaps one reason most North Americans could care less about soccer.

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Claude | July 9th, 2006 at 10:28 am
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The Italiens were lying all over the pitch when they played Germany. One would get up to be replaced by another Italien lying on the ground in sheer agony. I wonder what the injury stats would be if we took Italy out of the stats? The last Italien who wasn’t a whimp was probably Julius Caesar.

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Tuan | July 9th, 2006 at 2:49 pm
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Christopher, thank you for the link, I have signed the petition and urge all football lovers to put your names down for the good of the game.

Posted from Australia Australia

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Username By Hmmm | July 9th, 2006 at 4:34 pm
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And people dare to blame Portugal? Im not surprised if even FIFA takes the chance to use their team as scape goat for some bad decisions. EVERY team fakes/dives/cheats, and only the ones that cant face it blame a team that is considered “inferior”. At least those dont fake injuries to waste time.

Posted from Portugal Portugal

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Username By Hmmm | July 9th, 2006 at 4:36 pm
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And i hope FIFA noties that kind of petitions, the sooner they end with all those fakes, the sooner some countries will run out of excuses for their losses inside the stadium.

/me signed.

Posted from Portugal Portugal

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Username By Allez France | July 9th, 2006 at 5:20 pm
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The Italians are the best on their back…. France, stomp ‘em into the ground if they don’t get up.

Posted from United States United States

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