Referees Smile, Kaiser Fumes, Fans Cry

There are all kinds of emotions floating around the World Cup universe today. First, there is the referee from Benin who has to be psyched that he and all of the other World Cup refs will be paid $40,000 to blow calls this summer. That is double what the referees made in 2002 and should help to cover the cost of inflation, especially since they get put up in free housing for a month. In a rare and head scratching example of equity in this world, the same amount of money will be paid to the backup referees who won’t even step a foot on the pitch. We want that job.

Then there is Franz Beckenbauer who is a little grumpy after returning from his around-the-world trip. He is upset with FIFA’s audacity to criticize the German organizers of the World Cup.

“The FIFA has words of criticism for the organising committee over and over again,” said Beckenbauer, the president of the organising committee. “They’re completely superfluous.”

Somehow we think that the Kaiser will be receiving an email similar to this one in his mailbox today.

Finally, there are the fine people in Leipzig who are eager to live up to the World Cup motto, A Time to Make Friends. What better way to help out strangers than to give them a care package with condoms and tissues so they can dry their eyes after their team loses? That should make guys who get lucky very happy, as well as guys who just want to spend some time by themselves remembering Heidi Klum at the World Cup draw.