FIFA to Winner: Gives us Back our Trophy

January 29th, 2006 | by: WC Bob | View Comments

This just in from World Cup Blog’s Unfair News Correspondent: FIFA is thinking about allowing the winning nation to keep the World Cup trophy for only six weeks.

That’s right. After two years of blood, sweat and tears to hoist the magical World Cup trophy, the champions aren’t going to be able to display it on their trophy shelves for very long.

FIFA says that it is only doing this because it fears the trophy will be stolen. The Jules Rimet Trophy, the predecessor of the current World Cup, was stolen twice. The first was in 1966 in England although it was later discovered under a hedge by a dog called Pickles – true story.

The second time it was stolen from the Brazilian Football Federation in 1983 and melted down.

FIFA’s reaction to this seems like a bit of an overreaction if you ask me. The trophy hasn’t been stolen or melted down for the past 23 years. That’s not a bad track record in these dangerous times of high trophy theft.

Perhaps the better solution is to once again examine my eighth grade trophy. Clearly no thief would want it. I’ve tried melting it down plenty of times and can confirm that while precious to me, it is not a precious metal.

Forget handing out this one this summer. It will only cause you problems.

Give this trophy a try instead and let the winner stare at it for more than a measly six weeks.