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A New Way To Solve Problems

By: Daryl | July 16th, 2006 | 17 Comments »

Easily the best video made about the Zidane vs Materazzi incident, this is from Austria titled “A new way to solve problems.. do it like Zidane…”


In a similar vein, this Brazilian recreation of Materazzi’s red card against Australia looks ten times more dangerous than the original. Brace yourself…


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Username By Gian Luca | July 16th, 2006 at 3:42 am
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Hey, wouldn’t it be cool if Materazzi and Zidane really were THAT COOL and called each other to have a conversation like the following:

RIIIING! RIIING! (Phone rings. Zidane picks up.)

Mat: “Hey dude.”
Zid: “Watup…”
Mat: “Hey dude I called to say I am sorry about that bulls**t I said the other night. Ya know… when we were playing that b.s. WC?”
Zid: “No sweat, dude. I understand. I was kinda worked up myself…”
Mat: “Sssshhh***tt you were! Man, you put me to sleep… almost…”
Zid: “Sorry dude. That was too much. Next time, I’m just gonna pinch your nipple.”
Mat: “Hmm, honey… You know I can’t stand it when you do that…”
Zid: “Shut up, Matrix. Look at what a scene you made me do in front of everybody!”
Mat: “Easy dude, you know how it is, after your sister I was gonna go after your grandma… No, your momma, no, ‘coz you know how I feel about mothers… OK, man. Just wanted to apologize… See you at Spice Boy’s party…”
Zid: “OK… Oh, he invited you too?”
Mat: “No, I’m crashing… You know the type of guy I am… by now… I hope!”
Zid: “You crack me up, doo.”
Mat: “Just in for some fun. Later bee.”
Zid: “Later dog.”

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Gian Luca | July 16th, 2006 at 4:43 am
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RIIIING! RIIING! (Phone rings. Marco “Matrix” Materazzi picks up.)

Zid: “Hey Mat. Isn’t Posh Spice fine?”
Mat: “Shuddup, Zizou! You’re out of it! Go to sleep!”

BANG! (Mat slams the telephone down!)

Mat [thinking]: “Ssshhheeeeet, I almost got scared they’d take Moggi’s portrait… ehm, the World Cup statuette away from me… Meeeeiiiin, I gotta relax…”

Posted from United States United States

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Username By dietmar | July 16th, 2006 at 7:09 am
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nice, but are ya sure thats what the phone sounds like in france?…lol

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Nawaf | July 16th, 2006 at 10:15 am
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This video is tasteless. Materazzi got what he deserved. Zidane did not want to hurt him, if he did, he would have gone for the face. Insluting one’s mother and family should NEVER be tolerated.

Posted from Kuwait Kuwait

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Username By nicko | July 16th, 2006 at 10:41 am
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I love this video, people who take life too seriously end up either getting shot in some war or having a heart-attack after years of painful hemeroids, lighten up Nawaf!

Posted from Australia Australia

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Username By Kruman | July 16th, 2006 at 11:24 am
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Enjoy the beautiful game at it’s best:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=dYUtKKbBTkw&search=zidane

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Nawaf | July 16th, 2006 at 11:54 am
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Kruman: Zidane is the King indeed

Posted from Kuwait Kuwait

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Username By Kruman | July 16th, 2006 at 12:09 pm
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Keep up the good work Nawaf!

You are doing a great service to the beautiful game and its fans.

Posted from United States United States

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Username By dietmar | July 16th, 2006 at 5:34 pm
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hey kruman,
good eye man, that was a really cool vid, got my morning started nicely. thing is though, after watching it, i had a serious case of world cup withdrawl. someone sing along:
ole’ oleoleole’ ole’ ole’, everybody now…ok, ok, you see what i mean?

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Gian Luca | July 17th, 2006 at 2:41 pm
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Kruman, I didn’t see the signature headbutts in Zidane’s video. Why did you guys edit those out?

That looked like “selective memory” Disney romanticism.

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Username By zidaneisking | July 17th, 2006 at 3:00 pm
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“Kruman, I didn’t see the signature headbutts in Zidane’s video. Why did you guys edit those out?
That looked like “selective memory” Disney romanticism”

Idiot moron ignorant smallminded comment. Why don’t you make a video of all the great moments of italian football including all the racism and violence and fights and corruption?

Posted from United States United States

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Username By ventura resident | July 17th, 2006 at 5:39 pm
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Krumann, thanks for a great clip. I think ZZ also deserves the golden legs award on top of the golden ball award… hmmm. yummy! @ LOL at Zidaneisking… well said.

Posted from United States United States

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Username By ZatsFun | July 17th, 2006 at 9:11 pm
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Plastic Zidane
sung to the tune of Plastic Jesus
© AZ 2006

Plastic Zidane, Plastic Zidane, riding on the dashboard of my car,
I don’t care if there’s rain or sleet on
The road at night, while my Plastic Zidane’s
Ridin’ on the dashboard of my car.

Maybe better weather’d please you,
But I’m just fine with Plastic Zizou
Riding there upon my vinyl dash,
Materazzi really stirred him
Zizou bowed and charged his sternum,
But he should’ve kicked his sorry aaaaaaaass….

Yeah, Materazzi is a lout!
Zizou should’ve knocked him out,
With his round and glorious bald head,
What the hell’d he say to Yaz?
Must’ve done much more than raz,
to make Zinedine earn the card that’s red…

Plastic Zidane, Plastic Zidane, riding on the dashboard of my car…

Thee Italians won the Cup,
France was just the runner-up,
1 to 1 at half time, we were tense,
Extra time and penalty kicks,
Let th’Italians play there cheap tricks,
Now we cannot wait ‘till four years hence!

I will keep my tired eyes peeled fer
Critics of my French midfielder,
They’re short-sited and their wits are dim,
See, Zidane got the Golden Ball,
‘cause he just outplayed them all,
And everybody wished they kicked like him…

Plastic Zidane, Plastic Zidane, riding on the dashboard of my car…

Dust-storms may be comin’ at you,
But with that sweet Zidane statue,
You can drive in peace without alarm,
Yes, the roads can be a horror,
But with that Muslim-Franco scorer,
Not a single gust will do you harm.

Well, the path could not be slicker,
But that 6 foot 1 ball-kicker
Makes you feel that nothing can be wrong,
The landscape might be all the same,
But with the old man of the game
You will feel like singing out this song…

Plastic Zidane, Plastic Zidane, riding on the dashboard of my car…

Zinedine is just a man,
Lose his temper? Sure he can,
But no one dances with the ball as he,
Muslim, Christ-ee-an, & Jew,
Cheered the Captain of Les Bleus
When the team returned to Gay Paree…

Henry comes in Plastic too
You can purchase all the crew
As an incandescent plastic team,
Maybe you want Figo also
Or Ballack as a German doll, so
Collect ‘em all and hold ‘em in esteem…

Plastic Zidane, Plastic Zidane, riding on the dashboard of my car…

Well, Zinedine went on a show,
Just so that we all could know,
What that nasty Materazzi said,
Cheap shots ‘bout his Sis’ and Mom
Set off Zinedine’s alarm,
Then he butted Marco with his head…
Zizou said to les enfants,
His reaction to the taunts,
Weren’t th’example that he meant to set
But he’s just a human man,
Under pressure, off he ran,
And he added that there’s no regret.

Plastic Zidane, Plastic Zidane, riding on the dashboard of my car…

Domenech was ever proud,
And he said to all aloud,
That the whole wide world would miss Zizou,
And with him we all agree,
So we want to say “merci,”
To Les Bleus and ‘specially to you!

Zizou, you’ll not be forgot,
All the world loves you a lot,
New York, Buenos Aires to Paree,
Say Chirac and all the rest
“A genius with the ball”, “the best”,
You have made your mark in history…

(slower and softer)
Driving on la route ce soir,
Zidane’s ridin’ in my car,
And to sadness now I feel immune
Like to take a longer tour
With Zizou here in my voiture,
But it’s time to finish up this tune… (un deux toi!)

Plastic Zidane, Plastic Zidane, riding on the dashboard of my car…

Plastic Zidane © AZ 2006/ all rights reserved

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Amanda | July 29th, 2006 at 11:41 am
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LOVE the video!

LMAO at Gian Luca’s comments! Funny.

ZatsFun, best damn poem EVER!!!

I

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Amanda | July 29th, 2006 at 11:41 am
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I

Posted from United States United States

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Username By Amanda | July 29th, 2006 at 11:42 am
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*I love Zizou. Too bad he’s married!

Posted from United States United States

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Username By cup | October 10th, 2007 at 8:42 pm
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Cool!cup mats

Posted from Australia Australia

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